September 2013

From Black to Living Color

Sometimes, God does not make sense.  Sometimes, God does big work in small, slow ways that are not easy to express in words, but I will try. 

BlackI came to Living Waters two years ago because it was recommended to me.  I wasn’t thrilled about the idea, but I showed up.  At that time, I saw myself as someone not worth the air she inhaled.  There were many disconnections between the person I tried to present to the world and the person I was on the inside—although I didn’t realize this at the time.  Years of counseling had not been able to touch that issue.  I was emotionally numb, as well, and I had assumed that this was the way my life would continue.  Black was my favorite color. 

Living waters has been the missing piece that has shown me how to get on the right page with God and begin to accept His trustworthiness.  The kind hearted, gentle prayers of the leaders have invited Jesus into places in my heart that have been walled off for decades.

With that said, I am at a loss to explain why Living Waters has brought about such deep changes in me.  But, I do know that in those Wednesday night meetings, I have had the support to find God on a different level and understand Him from a different place… a place where the wounds are deep and run the span of my life.  I can talk about the dirty, bloody stains of my existence with other Christians and they don’t turn away in embarrassment, awkwardness or fear.  Instead, they pray and invite Jesus to come and take care of my wounds.  And slowly but surely, He has come and debrided them – flushing out years of spiritual and emotional gangrene that has been eating me alive: stealing my life.

ColorI can’t thank the leaders enough for showing me how to move forward and leave behind the bad, while hanging onto what has been good.  I now understand that God has good in store for me, as I continue to heal from past injuries of the soul and spirit.

God will continue to be Mysterious.  He does things in His own time and in His own way and Living Waters is a group that has been instrumental in changing my life.  And for that, I am very, very grateful.

Karen

 

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